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  • National Speed Presents: The Automotively Challenged

    There are some people that were born to sit behind the wheel of a car. These are not those people…

    1) Car Rotisserie. This is what happens when gearheads with too much spare time get inspired while stuck in front of the spinning chicken rack at Golden Corral. I can’t imagine anything else that would compel someone to do this to their car. Then again, maybe they just have an unhealthy obsession with Johnny 5’s eyebrows. If anybody actually gets that reference come by National Speed and I’ll buy you a Coke. Not really, but it’s the thought that counts, right guys?

    2) Worst Car Mods. There’s no sound to this clip but the video more than speaks for itself. Part of me hopes that these are photoshopped and that no sane person would create automobiles this ugly but deep down I know they’re real. May God have mercy on their poor, aesthetically challenged souls.

    3) Backasswards. This is security camera footage of a driver that can’t back out of a parking space to save their life.

    4) More Parking Trouble. More security camera footage of the parking challenged.

    5) When Cars Attack. To prove that I’m not sexist, I’ve included a clip of another boneheaded driver that has some problems getting out of a parking deck. He’s a guy, or at least he was before the end of this clip. Almost getting run down by your own car is a complete violation of man law.

    Got any videos you’d like to share with National Speed? Leave us a comment and we’ll post ‘em up in our next video blog.

  • Diesel Dyno Day

    Saturday, September 20th marked National Speed’s first annual Diesel Dyno Day. In between coughing fits from all the smoke and chomping down on juicy burgers we ended up dynoing over ten massive diesels with John Porterfield taking home the most horsepower trophy (826.84) and Nate Eix claiming most torque (1020). Congratulations guys, but I still don’t think you have enough under the hood to take on my Ford Focus…Please don’t run me over.

    The Speed Girls made their debut at the event, raffling off prizes, giving away free t-shirts, and keeping our technician John company. He needs that kind of ego boost. Just kidding, John…but not really.

    Towards the end of the day smoke was flying everywhere with several of the trucks making over 800 horsepower and two of them maxing out the dyno’s torque reading. It was an awesome event with some serious diesel power on display. We really gave the dyno’s ventilation system a workout.

    To see more pics from National Speed’s Diesel Dyno Day click here. Thanks again to everybody for showing up and making it a great event. We’ll see you guys at the next one!

  • National Speed Presents: And Now For Something Completely Different…

    This is something new we’re trying out in the blog. Every Wednesday we’re going to post a humorous pic from the shop, random artwork from the crazies in Cubeville, or something incredibly weird to justify your mouse clicks. For example, today you get a rare glimpse at rare works of art from National Speed’s dry erase board. Warning: not for the faint of heart.

    Merbot!

    This is Merbot. We’re not sure how in the hell a robot/mermaid survives in water but nevertheless here he/she/it is for your viewing pleasure.

    Pancakes!

    Currently on loan from the National Museum of Art, Pancakes is a modern art masterpiece. Take a closer look at the penmanship on the six-legged tentacle creature known simply as Zed. It’s exquisite work that’s said to have inspired Leonardo DaVinci, Michaelangelo, and other lesser known Ninja Turtles.

    Stay tuned for next Wednesday’s installment where you can see even more brain droppings from National Speed. As always if you have any funny pictures, artwork, etc you’d like to share leave us a comment and we’ll post it in a future blog.

  • The Unusual Suspects

    Those of you that frequent the shop have probably already met our technicians Ben, Bobby, John, and Tim (and if you haven’t check them out here) but what about the rest of the guys and girls of National Speed? Peek behind the curtain and behold the astonishing, fantastic, and in the case of Jordan, just plain weird employees of National Speed.


    Vincent Alfaro
    Alias: Short Round
    Vince is our badass graphic designer, which means he colors within the lines, and if he doesn’t he can make up a cool excuse for why he didn’t. “It’s like…artistic, man.” He also gets major cool points for looking like Short Round from Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom.


    Dennis Corpuz
    Alias: Numb3rs
    Dennis is our accountant and keeps track of how many Red Bull IOU’s everybody owes. With the amount of caffeine around here it’s pretty much a full time job. Then again so is keeping up with James and his daily trips to Zaxby’s. The man is serious about his chicken.


    Shane Karalewitz
    Alias: The Parts Guy
    Shane is the Director of Vendor Relations & Logistics or as he likes to put it, “the parts guy.” He grew up on the mean streets of Detroit and from looking at his picture doesn’t he just scream thug life? It takes an original gangster to drive a Slimer-green Nissan 240 SX.


    James Moncure
    Alias: The Zaxby
    When he’s not eating at Zaxby’s, James serves as National Speed’s Chief Financial Officer. He has over 10 years experience in the financial industry, as well as over 4 years experience as a successful entrepreneur in the retail sector. Just don’t ask him how to work the fax machine.


    Casey Robinson
    Alias: Space Hamster
    Casey is our over-caffeinated Copywriter/Media Specialist, which basically means he sits at his desk surfing MySpace when he should be writing. He’s an expert at pretending to work and has an unhealthy obsession with all things movie related. His Ford Focus is the envy of everyone at National Speed.


    Nathan Snell (Schnell)
    Alias: The Baron
    Nathan is the Vice President of Web Development, but don’t let the fancy title fool you. Beneath the corporate veneer is a stone cold operative highly trained in hand-to-hand combat, cage fighting, and clerical efficiency. He may drive a K.I.A. but that’s because he always kills in action.


    Josh Tobey
    Alias: Office Ninja
    Josh is our resident Web Developer and has the stillness of a praying mantis. Seriously, watching him work is like an exercise in Zen efficiency. He’s the ninja of National Speed. You don’t even realize he’s there until he materializes out of thin air. He’s that talented.


    Nina Voltaire
    Alias: Hollywood
    What doesn’t Nina do around here? Besides putting up with a shop full of guys, Nina is our Executive Assistant and a big New Kids on the Block fan. Don’t hold that against her though. What she lacks in musical taste she more than makes up for in cars — the 2010 Chevy Camaro SS will be hers.


    Scott Walker
    Alias: Speed Walker
    Scott is our marketing intern and the only guy cool enough to rock a pink turbo. He skates, he races, and he had his picture taken with Jessica Barton. Too bad she doesn’t date guys that drive ’81 civics…or does she?


    J
    ordan Watson
    Alias: Zed
    Jordan is a giant and devours small cities in his spare time. Working as our Performance Consultant he practically lives at the shop. From the moment the customer walks in the door, to the moment they walk out, everything in between is the Performance Consultant’s responsibility.

  • National Speed Quickies: 2010 Mustang, 125 rwhp Golf Cart, and New Lambo Concept

    It’s boring to read the news, that’s why National Speed is cutting out all the fat and giving you only the stuff that matters. No politics, sports, or world events — unless its automotive related. We understand that you’re busy people and don’t want to read boring introductory paragraphs (irony!) so let’s cut to the chase and give you all the news that’s fit to print and probably some that’s not…

    The 2010 Ford Mustang has made another appearance, this time getting snapped by the guys over at Jalopnik. Judging from the pics little has changed since the last iteration. Seems that Ford is sticking to the old axiom, “if it ain’t broken, don’t fix it.” While that may be true, there’s only so long the current crop of Mustangs will hold people’s interest until they start to get a little bored…if they aren’t already.

    Navarez Racing Products mounted a four cylinder Yamaha R1 rocket bike engine to a golf cart — and it generates 125 rear wheel horsepower! Loyal readers of our blog will realize that I have a slight obsession with golf carts, especially ridiculously powered ones like this one. Check out the vid below to see it in action.

    Edmunds Inside Line is reporting that Lamborghini will unveil something completely different than what they’re known for at the 2008 Paris Auto Show. What could it possibly be? A High-performance luxury mini-van? Flying Hybrids? Rumors abound but sources close to Lamborghini say that the grand unveiling will most likely be a four-door super sedan. No word on if it flies.

    And that concludes this week’s quickie. Was it as good for you as it was for us? As usual if you have any news to submit leave us a comment or send us an email and we’ll post it in a future blog. Stay Classy!

  • National Speed Presents: 5 Epic Automotive Fails

    I hate to admit it, but I’m a bit of a rubbernecker. When I see a crash on the side of the road, I slow my car down to Flintstones speed just so I can get a better look at the remains (of the car — not the body, sickos). And while there’s nothing funny about automotive accidents, you’ve got to admit that these are some truly epic fails.

    1) Flipping Sweet! I still don’t see how this guy survives. He flips at least 8 times and perfectly nails the dismount. Synchronized car crashing should be an Olympic sport — if Curling counts then certainly we can get synchronized car crashing in there.

    2) Don’t Do It! This clip gets funnier every time I watch it just for the owner of the car shouting in the background, “NO! DON’T DO IT! NO!” I have a demented sense of humor, what can I say…

    3) Ghost Riding Dirty. Anybody that’s stupid enough to Ghost Ride deserves to have their car stolen. Disclaimer: I’m sure this is fake but because I hate Ghost Riding so much I have to include it on the list to encourage future carjackers.

    4) Wheels Optional. I might be wrong but generally you have a better chance of winning a drag race if your wheels stay on during the actual racing. I could be wrong, though.

    5) Wear Your Helmet! Another ridiculous crash. No one was harmed in the making of this video, which means you can enjoy it without feeling guilty.

    Got any videos you’d like to share with National Speed? Leave us a comment and we’ll post ’em up in our next vid blog. Remember: your epic fail can be enjoyed by all, so keep those video cameras rolling.

  • National Speed News: Greddy Bankrupt, Turbonetics no longer selling turbo kits, Women Love High Performance, and more!

    Here’s the news that’s breaking so fast we drove our news van into the wall just to get it to you.

    According to recent financial reports, Greddy, one of the biggest names in performance parts recently announced they’re declaring bankruptcy. Autoblog reports that this is due to a steady decline in the Japanese performance parts market as well as Greddy’s mounting financial woes. The company is currently $60 million in debt.

    Greddy isn’t the only one having issues as our sources within Turbonetics have stated that Turbonetics will no longer be selling turbo kits. At present the only turbo kit they’ll continue to sell is for Mustangs. The company is also planning on phasing out its line of intercoolers with the exception of the diesel side of their business.

    Wired wrote a great article stating that British insurance company Hiscox recently conducted a study proving that high-performance cars turned women on more than fuel-efficient vehicles. Well, duh. Not to say we told you so, but we did. The study involved playing sound clips of high performance cars and fuel efficient cars revving their engines — no one preferred the sound of a fuel efficient car.

    The latest trailer for the next awkwardly titled James Bond flick, Quantum of Solace, has made its online debut. Check it out to see the Aston Martin DB7 in action. Man is that a sweet car.

  • NY Times Chooses Life Not Speed

    The New York Times published an article yesterday calling for all vehicles sold in the United States to only be able to go 75 mph. In effect this means that no car will be able to grossly exceed the speed limit because the car itself is severely limited. The author, Kent A. Sepkowitz, states that this will cut down on the 13,000 people a year killed in traffic accidents.

    Unfortunately, what Mr. Sepkowitz doesn’t take into account is that if his car can only reach 75 mph how is he going to escape the wrath of the millions of drivers in the United States that want to run him down?

    You’d think that the New York Times would only publish writers with common sense and simple logic but obviously that’s not the case. If Mr. Sepkowitz had any of those traits he would’ve realized before he wrote his knee jerk article that of those 13,000 traffic deaths per year, there’s no way to prove that speeding was the actual cause of death. Hell, more than half of the drivers involved in those accidents could’ve had alcohol in their system, in which case wouldn’t drunk driving be the cause of death?

    Does Mr. Sepkowitz really think that people will stand for limiting the speed of their cars? If something like this was actually passed by Congress, automobile sales would plummet causing more chaos than 13,000 traffic deaths per year. If Mr. Sepkowitz is so worried about dangerous drivers perhaps he’d be happier taking the bus. At least then there’d be one less idiot behind the wheel.

    For more statistics regarding Mr. Sepkowitz’s dubious claims check out Jalopnik’s coverage on the subject.

  • Carmeggedon: Vehicles of the Apocalypse

    If you’re anything like me you spend a good portion of your day thinking about meaningless crap: if I jumped off the Wrightsville bridge would I survive? What would happen if I drove my car through Home Depot? If zombies attacked which shopping mall would I call home? And my latest prize winner: when the world ends and the apocalypse comes, what vehicle would I drive?

    Ever since I started working at National Speed I’ve given that last one a lot of thought (when you’re surrounded by noxious fumes and huffable magic markers you’d be surprised what goes through your head). Surprisingly, I’m not the only one with a demented brain around here. If the peeps at National Speed are any indication, when the apocalypse comes the wasteland is going to be an interesting place to drive around in.

    1. The Wienermobile. Laugh all you want, but when you’re driving around in an apocalyptic wasteland all day you’re going to want a little excitement. Beneath the bun this dog is packing a 5700 GM VORTEC engine which is plenty of bite for a wiener shaped car. Mount a custom fabricated rocket launcher on the rear and dual machine gun turrets on the front and you’ve got one mean hush puppy.

    2. Riding Lawnmower. Good things come in small packages (at least that’s what my ex-girlfriend used to tell me) so a souped-up riding lawnmower should do the trick. Funnily enough, they actually race these things in Ottawa — some upwards of 200 hp. Those crazy Cannucks! Drop in some nitrous, a .50 caliber machine gun, and maybe some razor-sharp cutting blades and you’ll be ready to kick some serious grass.

    3. V8 Barstool. Possibly the coolest thing I’ve ever seen. A custom-built barstool with a V8 engine. Absolutely insane. Believe it or not, there’s an official barstool racing league in the Bonneville Salt Flats. Because of the stool’s small size there’s not a lot of room for weapons modifications, but you could easily install an oil slick, smoke screen, maybe even spiked tire shredders that’ll bring a whole new meaning to “last call.”

    With astronomical gas prices, global warming, and a fourth Fast & Furious on the way to multiplexes, the end is surely nigh. Submit your photos and share your vehicle ideas with National Speed for what you’ll be driving when the apocalypse dawns…and if you pick the Toyota Prius we’re all going to laugh at you. Seriously.

  • Top 3 Hybrids That Make Me Want to Pollute the Environment – part I

    Why does saving the environment have to be so ugly? Is it a requirement that every hybrid has to look like something from a made for Sci-fi Channel movie? Every time I pass one on the street I half expect to find Casper Van Dien behind the wheel. Better technology is all well and good, but if it comes at the cost of driving the equivalent of an electric shaver you can count me out. Just looking at a Prius makes me want to drive the nastiest, gas guzzling beast I can lay hands on and burn through tires like they’re made of Bubble Yum. And while you’re probably thinking I sound like a shallow, mother-nature-hating jackass (and you’re not far off), take a look at these cars and tell me they wouldn’t make you proud to pollute.

    1. The Toyota Prius. The battery for this little baby is advertised as lasting as long as the life of the car, which if you’re anything like me you’ll be praying for a mercy killing by the first mile. I kid, I kid. Honestly, for the price and the horsepower, the Prius isn’t that bad of a car. It’s just so damn ugly. Little known fact: according to engineer Walter Whitwicky, the Prius is the first car that crash test dummies have refused to ride in. True story.

    2. The Honda Insight. Honda stopped production of the Honda Insight as of September 2006. Less than 2,000 Insights were sold in 2005, and they fell below 1,000 in 2006. Honda stated that this was due to their strategic marketing plans to introduce a smaller hybrid in 2009 and had absolutely nothing to due with the fact that the Insight was about as much fun as a nuclear holocaust. Sure it may get 70+ mpg, but do you really want to be seen driving something like that? I didn’t think so.

    3. Honda’s 2009 Mystery Hybrid. Pop quiz: you’ve just built the ugliest car known to man and sold less than 3,000 units in two years. What do you do? Well, if you’re anything like Honda, you release something almost as hideous as their last collosal failure, the Insight. While we’re not sure what Honda’s calling this one yet, it might as well be the Insight 2.0 — bigger, badder, and uglier. Hat tip to Jalopnik for originally leaking the story and providing pictures of what will no doubt be the ugliest car of 2009.

    Perhaps if car companies would design a decent looking, affordable hybrid, car enthusiasts might be more interested in driving them. But then again, considering hybrid technology isn’t as eco-friendly as it’s made out to be, maybe consumers are right in not buying them. Check out part two of our hybrid blog to find out why.